What Shall I Say? Walking Softly Through Divine Mystery
When Joshua's army fled before their enemies, he cried out in bitter bewilderment: "What shall I say?" (Joshua 7:8). Our Lord Himself uttered these same words when His soul was overwhelmed with grief in the prospect of His agonies, bloody sweat, and sacrificial death (John 12:27). The speaker in Isaiah 38:15 was filled with perplexity by the dispensations of Divine Providence—circumstances so painful, so different from what was anticipated, that bewilderment became the only honest response.
Yet from this confusion emerges profound wisdom. The declaration "I shall go softly all my years" (Isaiah 38:15) carries the force of semnos—solemn, reverent walking. The Revised Version margin reads: "I shall go in solemn procession all my years because of the bitterness of my soul." This is not defeat but testimony: the speaker will walk henceforth subdued and thankful, remembering always the bitterness from which his soul has been delivered.
Escape from death grants new meaning to life itself. The sufferer becomes either a conqueror moving with steady purpose, or a worshipper whose every step ascends toward the throne of the Most High God. Afflictions transform our views of life. Wisdom is often born out of soul-bitterness. When our stage of action proves polluted, insecure, and vanishing—when we are weak and dying—to walk in humility, self-distrust, and holy fear becomes the truest wisdom.
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